Orthodox Beit Din Guide: What to Expect & How to Prepare

Preparing for your orthodox beit din is one of the most important steps in your conversion journey. However, with the right preparation and guidance, you can approach this milestone with confidence.

Let’s Talk About the Orthodox Beit Din (And Why You’re Probably More Nervous Than You Need to Be)

I’ve prepared hundreds of students for their orthodox beit din over the past 20+ years, and I can predict with about 99% accuracy what they’ll say when I first mention it:

“Rabbi, I’m terrified.”

I get it. The idea of sitting before three Orthodox rabbis who will ask you questions about your knowledge and commitment sounds intimidating. Students imagine a panel of stern men with long beards trying to catch them making mistakes, looking for any reason to reject them.

Here’s what I tell them: That’s not what’s going to happen.

The rabbis on your orthodox beit din aren’t your adversaries – they’re your welcoming committee. Moreover, they want you to succeed. By the time you’re sitting in front of them, they’ve already read my letter vouching for you. Consequently, they know I wouldn’t send you if you weren’t ready. Their job isn’t to find reasons to say no – it’s to confirm what I’ve already told them: that you’re genuinely prepared to join the Jewish people.

So take a deep breath. Let’s walk through exactly what’s going to happen so there are no surprises.

What Exactly IS an Orthodox Beit Din?

“Beit din” literally means “house of judgment” in Hebrew, which probably doesn’t help your anxiety. However, in the context of orthodox conversion, think of the orthodox beit din less as a courtroom and more as a serious conversation with three experienced rabbis who have genuine interest in your journey.

The orthodox beit din has a few jobs:

• Verify that you understand what you’re undertaking (this is a serious commitment!)
• Confirm that your knowledge is solid enough to live independently as an Orthodox Jew
• Assess whether your motivations are sincere (you’re doing this because you believe Judaism is true, not for external reasons)
• Make sure you grasp that you’re joining a people and taking on real obligations, not just adopting a philosophy

Notice what’s NOT on that list: trying to trick you, looking for reasons to reject you, or expecting scholarly perfection.

The Different Types of Orthodox Batei Din (And Why It Matters)

Not all batei din are created equal – not in terms of legitimacy, but in terms of how they operate. Here’s what you should know:

Community Orthodox Beit Din

This is an orthodox beit din run by your local Orthodox community or synagogue. If you’re working with me online but have built a relationship with a local rabbi who knows you well, we might use the local community orthodox beit din.

Advantages: First of all, the rabbis might already know you from seeing you at services. Additionally, the local rabbi who recommended you probably has a relationship with them. It’s familiar territory.

Considerations: On the other hand, these batei din might meet less frequently (quarterly instead of monthly), and standards can vary somewhat between communities.

Regional Beit Din

These serve multiple communities across a geographic area. For example, the Chicago Rabbinical Council (cRc), the Rabbinical Council of California, or similar regional organizations.

Advantages: Well-established procedures. Furthermore, they’re widely recognized and usually very professional and organized.

Considerations: You might need to travel a bit. Additionally, there might be longer wait times for appointments. They don’t know you personally (but they trust your sponsoring rabbi’s recommendation).

National/International Orthodox Batei Din

Organizations like the Rabbinical Council of America (RCA) GPS (Geirus Policies and Standards) program, or Chabad-affiliated batei din that operate nationally.

Advantages: Maximum recognition worldwide (especially important if you might move or want to make aliyah to Israel). Moreover, they have very clear, consistent standards and well-documented procedures.

Considerations: More formal process. Additionally, stricter documentation requirements. Can be harder to schedule. Often require more extensive preparation.

My role: I’ll help you determine which orthodox beit din makes the most sense for your situation. It depends on where you live, where you might move, and what your long-term plans are. Ultimately, we’ll choose the option that gives you the widest recognition while being practically accessible.

Whether you use a community orthodox beit din or a regional one depends on your specific situation and your rabbi’s recommendation.

Before the Orthodox Beit Din: Getting Ready (The Months Leading Up)

When I Recommend You

The orthodox beit din process actually starts long before you walk into that room. In fact, it starts when I determine you’re ready and contact the orthodox beit din on your behalf.

Here’s what I’ll do:

• Write a detailed letter of recommendation explaining your journey, your knowledge level, and why I believe you’re prepared
• Contact the beit din administrator to request an appointment
• Provide any documentation they require about your studies with me
• Coordinate with your local rabbi (if you have one) to ensure everyone’s on the same page

You don’t have to do any of this – I handle it. Therefore, your job is to keep living Jewishly and preparing mentally and spiritually for this milestone.

The Wait (Usually 2-3 Months)

Here’s something that surprises people: even after I recommend you, there’s usually a 2-3 month wait for an appointment. Many batei din only meet monthly or quarterly, and they often have a backlog of candidates.

Most students reach this orthodox beit din stage 18-24 months into their journey. Learn more about the typical Orthodox conversion timeline.

Use this time wisely:

• Continue your regular observance (don’t change anything or try to “cram”)
• Deepen your involvement in community life
• Review areas where you feel less confident
• Talk to me about any anxiety or questions
• Remember: I wouldn’t have recommended you if I didn’t believe you were ready

What to Bring on the Day

Every orthodox beit din requires similar documentation, though specific requirements may vary slightly. The orthodox beit din will give you a list, but typically you’ll need:

• Government-issued ID (driver’s license or passport) – they need to verify you are who you say you are
• Birth certificate (original or certified copy) – official documentation for your conversion certificate
• My letter of recommendation – I’ll have already sent this, but bring a copy just in case
• Payment – typically $200-$500 depending on the beit din (yes, there’s a fee; it covers administrative costs and the mikvah)
• Your best, most modest clothing – more on this below

For men specifically: If you’re not yet circumcised or need hatafat dam brit (ritual drawing of a drop of blood if you were already circumcised medically), this is usually scheduled before your orthodox beit din or sometimes right before the mikvah. We’ll discuss the logistics well in advance.

What to Wear (Yes, It Matters)

Your appearance matters – not because these rabbis are superficial, but because how you dress demonstrates that you understand and respect Orthodox standards of modesty and the seriousness of the occasion.

Dress Code for Men

For men:

• Dark suit or dress pants with button-down shirt and tie
• Kippah (obviously – you’ll be wearing it throughout)
• Tzitzit, if you’ve been wearing them (if not, don’t start the day of!)
• Nice shoes (closed-toe, no sneakers)
• Clean-shaven or neatly groomed beard

What NOT to wear: Jeans, t-shirts, casual shirts, anything wrinkled or sloppy. This isn’t the time to express your personal style – it’s the time to show you understand Orthodox norms.

Dress Code for Women

For women:

• Modest dress or skirt that falls below the knee (when sitting!)
• Top that covers your collarbone and reaches past your elbows
• Closed-toe shoes with modest heel
• No pants, no tight clothing, no low necklines
• Minimal jewelry and makeup (tasteful, not flashy)
• If you’re married, appropriate head covering as per Orthodox practice (discuss with me)

I know some of you are thinking “But Rabbi, this seems old-fashioned!” Perhaps. However, here’s the thing: if you’re not comfortable dressing modestly for one afternoon, we might need to have a longer conversation about whether Orthodox Judaism is really the right fit for you. Because this is how Orthodox Jews dress for serious religious occasions. Forever.

Final Prep Sessions with Me

In the weeks before your orthodox beit din, we’ll have special preparation sessions. I’ve prepared hundreds of students for their orthodox beit din, and I know exactly how to help you feel confident and ready.

During these sessions, we’ll:

• Review potential questions they might ask
• Practice your answers (out loud – it helps!)
• Address any gaps in your knowledge
• Work through your anxiety and nervousness
• Discuss the spiritual significance of this moment
• Pray together

I’ve done this hundreds of times. Consequently, I know what they’re going to ask, I know what they’re looking for, and I know you’re ready. My job in these sessions is to help you trust what you already know.

The Day of Your Orthodox Beit Din: A Minute-by-Minute Walk-Through

Let me take away the mystery by walking you through exactly what’s going to happen:

Arrival (30-45 Minutes Before)

Arrive early – not just 5 minutes early, but 15-20 minutes early. You want time to:

• Use the restroom (nervous bladder is real)
• Check that you have all your documents
• Take some deep breaths
• Say a few prayers
• Settle your nerves

Your sponsoring rabbi (me or your local rabbi) might be there with you, depending on the orthodox beit din’s policy. Some allow the rabbi to sit in, others don’t. Either way, you’re not alone – you have our recommendations supporting you.

The Waiting Room (10-15 Minutes)

You’ll wait in a reception area. Other conversion candidates might be there too. Feel free to make friends – you’re all in this together!

Meanwhile, the administrator will verify your documents and collect any fees. They’ll review what’s about to happen and answer any last-minute questions.

Pro tip: Bring a bottle of water. Dry mouth from nervousness is very common.

Entering the Room (Deep Breath!)

You’ll be brought into a room with three rabbis, typically sitting at a table or behind a desk. The setup is usually fairly formal but not hostile. There might be a chair for you facing them.

When you enter:

• Greet them respectfully (“Good afternoon, Rabbis” or similar)
• Wait for them to invite you to sit
• Make eye contact and smile (they’re people too!)
• Sit up straight but try to relax

Opening (5-10 Minutes)

One of the rabbis (usually the head of the orthodox beit din) will introduce the panel and explain the process. They’ll typically start with something like:

“Thank you for coming today. We’ve read Rabbi Coffman’s letter about you, and we’re here to have a conversation about your journey to Judaism. This isn’t a test – we want to get to know you and understand your commitment. We’re here to support you, not trick you. Please relax and just be yourself.”

They might ask you to introduce yourself: “Tell us a bit about yourself – where you’re from, what you do, how you came to be interested in Judaism.”

This is your moment to tell your story naturally. Therefore, don’t give a rehearsed speech – just talk like a human being about your genuine journey.

The Main Questions (30-60 Minutes)

Now comes the heart of the meeting. They’ll ask questions in several categories. Let me prepare you for what’s coming:

Questions About Your Motivation

Why they ask: They need to know you’re converting for the right reasons – because you genuinely believe Judaism is true and want to live as a Jew, not for external motivations.

What they might ask:

• “Why do you want to become Jewish?”
• “What will you do if your family strongly opposes this?”
• “If you’re engaged: What if the relationship doesn’t work out? Will you still be Jewish?”
• “What about Judaism speaks to you?”
• “Have you considered the challenges of Orthodox life?”

What they’re really asking: “Is this person genuinely committed to Judaism itself, or are they just going through the motions for someone else’s benefit?”

How to answer well: Be honest and personal. Furthermore, tell them about your spiritual journey, not what you think they want to hear. If you’re converting for marriage, don’t pretend you’re not – but emphasize that through that initial connection, you’ve come to genuinely love and believe in Judaism itself. They’ve heard every story. What matters is authenticity.

Questions About Jewish Knowledge

Why they ask: They need to know you have sufficient knowledge to live independently as an Orthodox Jew. You don’t need to be a scholar, but you need working competence.

What they might ask:

• “Walk us through your Shabbat, from Friday afternoon through Saturday night.”
• “Explain the basics of keeping kosher.”
• “What’s your daily prayer routine?”
• “Describe the major Jewish holidays and their significance.”
• “Can you recite the Shema for us?” (You can use the English too!)
• “What are mitzvot, and why do we observe them?”
• “Explain the difference between biblical and rabbinic law.”

What they’re really asking: “Does this person know enough to actually live as an Orthodox Jew without constant supervision?”

How to answer well: Speak from your lived experience, not from memorized textbook answers. For example, instead of “One observes Shabbat by refraining from 39 categories of labor,” say “On Friday afternoon, I start preparing – showering, setting up the meals, lighting candles 18 minutes before sunset…” They want to hear that you’re living it, not just studying it.

If you forget something: It’s okay to say “I’m nervous and blanking right now, but I know this…” or “I’d need to look that up to give you the details.” Honestly, honesty beats trying to fake knowledge you don’t have.

Questions About Belief

Why they ask: Conversion requires accepting fundamental Jewish beliefs. You don’t need to have every theological question resolved, but you do need to affirm core tenets.

What they might ask:

• “Do you believe in one God?”
• “Do you accept that the Torah is from God?”
• “What does it mean that the Jewish people have a covenant with God?”
• “What do you understand by ‘chosen people’?”
• “How do you reconcile [some difficult Jewish concept]?”

What they’re really asking: “Does this person accept the fundamentals of Jewish faith, or are they trying to be Jewish while rejecting Torah?”

How to answer well: You need to affirm belief in one God and acceptance of Torah as divinely given. However, you can acknowledge questions or struggles with certain concepts (we all have them!), but your fundamental theological commitments need to be clear. This isn’t the time for “Well, I’m not sure if I really believe in God, but I like the culture…”

Questions About Community Integration

Why they ask: Judaism is lived in community. Therefore, they need to know you’re not just learning ABOUT Jews but living AMONG Jews.

What they might ask:

• “Tell us about your involvement in the Jewish community.”
• “Where do you attend services?”
• “Who are your Jewish friends? Tell us about them.”
• “How has the community received you?”
• “What Jewish homes have you been in for Shabbat meals?”

What they’re really asking: “Is this person actually part of a Jewish community, or are they learning in isolation?”

How to answer well: Use names and specific examples. For instance, “My friend Sarah invites me for Shabbat meals regularly, and I’ve become close with the Goldstein family who live two blocks from me.” Not “I attend services at Congregation Beth Torah.” They want to hear about relationships, not attendance records.

Practical Scenario Questions

Why they ask: They want to see that you’ve thought through how to navigate real-world Orthodox life and aren’t going to fall apart the first time something is hard.

What they might ask:

• “Your boss asks you to work on Shabbat. What do you do?”
• “You’re invited to a business dinner at a non-kosher restaurant. How do you handle it?”
• “Your non-Jewish family invites you to Christmas dinner. What do you do?”
• “You can’t find a minyan in your area. How do you maintain Jewish practice?”

What they’re really asking: “When push comes to shove, will this person actually keep the commitments they’re making today?”

How to answer well: Show you understand the principle (Shabbat can’t be compromised) but also the practical realities. For example, you’d need to explain to your boss in advance, perhaps offer to work Sunday instead, or look for a different job if necessary. They don’t want theoretical answers; they want realistic ones.

The Deliberation (5-10 Minutes)

After they’ve asked their questions, they’ll typically excuse you: “Thank you. Please wait outside while we discuss.”

This is the longest 5-10 minutes of your life. Nevertheless, try not to panic. They’re not looking for reasons to say no – they’re confirming what they’ve already seen: that you’re ready.

The Decision

They’ll call you back in. One of the rabbis will speak for the panel. The orthodox beit din’s decision is usually given immediately after their brief deliberation.

If you’re approved (which you will be!):

“We’re pleased to welcome you to the Jewish people. You’ve demonstrated genuine commitment and sufficient knowledge. We approve your conversion. Mazal tov!”

They’ll explain next steps – usually proceeding to the mikvah either immediately or within the next few days.

If they ask for more preparation (rare for my students):

“We see your sincerity and progress, but we’d like you to develop more [specific area] before we proceed. Please work with Rabbi Coffman on [specific topics] and return in [timeframe].”

This isn’t a rejection – it’s guidance. And it’s very rare for students I send, because I don’t send people who aren’t ready.

After Approval: The Mikvah

Once the orthodox beit din approves you, the final step is immersion in a mikvah – a ritual bath. This is the actual moment of conversion.

For Men

If you needed brit milah or hatafat dam brit, that typically happens before the mikvah (often earlier that day or in the days before).

The immersion itself:

• You’ll shower thoroughly and remove all jewelry, bandages, anything on your body
• You’ll enter the mikvah water completely naked (it’s private, don’t worry)
• You’ll immerse completely – every part of you under water (typically 3 times)
• While in the water, you’ll recite the blessing for immersion
• A rabbi or mikvah attendant will be present to verify the immersion was complete

The whole process takes about 10-15 minutes.

For Women

Women’s mikvah immersion is similar but with a female attendant:

• You’ll shower thoroughly, shampoo your hair, remove all makeup, nail polish, jewelry
• The female mikvah attendant will check that your preparation is complete
• You’ll enter the water completely naked (fully private)
• You’ll immerse completely three times
• While in the water, you’ll recite the blessing
• The attendant watches only to verify complete immersion (she’s seen it all before, try not to be self-conscious)

This takes about 20-30 minutes including preparation.

The Moment Itself

Students often ask me: “Rabbi, what will I feel?”

Honestly? It varies. Some people describe overwhelming spiritual emotion – tears, joy, a sense of coming home. On the other hand, others feel surprisingly calm and peaceful. Some feel anticlimactic in the moment and then it hits them later.

All of these are normal. What matters isn’t the feeling – it’s the reality. You go under the water as a non-Jew. You come up Jewish. That’s profound, regardless of whether you feel fireworks in that specific moment.

After the Mikvah

• The beit din issues your official conversion certificate
• You receive your Hebrew name (if you chose one)
• You are now fully, completely, 100% Jewish
• You can be called to the Torah, counted in a minyan, marry a Jew, everything
• Mazal tov!

Many communities have a small celebration or acknowledgment. Your sponsoring rabbi might do something special. But the main thing is: you did it. Welcome home.

Frequently Asked Questions (The Ones You’re Too Nervous to Ask)

“What if I’m so nervous I can’t think straight?”

The rabbis expect nervousness – it shows you’re taking this seriously! If you blank on something, just say “I’m really nervous right now and my mind went blank, but I do know this…” They’re understanding. In fact, I’ve never seen a candidate rejected for being nervous.

“Can you come with me?”

It depends on the orthodox beit din’s policy. Some allow your sponsoring rabbi to sit in; others don’t. Either way, remember: my recommendation is already sitting on their desk. In a very real sense, I’m already in that room with you.

“What if they ask something I disagree with?”

This is not the time for theological debates with the orthodox beit din. If they ask about core Orthodox beliefs, you need to affirm them. However, if it’s a question where there’s legitimate debate among Orthodox authorities, you can acknowledge different views while stating your commitment to follow halachah as determined by your rabbi.

For example: If they ask about a specific political position, you can respectfully say “I’m still learning and developing my views on that, but I’m committed to following halachah.” But if they ask “Do you believe Torah is from God?” the answer needs to be yes.

“Will they try to talk me out of it?”

There’s an old custom of “pushing away” converts three times to test their sincerity. Modern batei din don’t really do this literally, but they might ask challenging questions like “Do you understand how hard this will be?” or “Are you sure about this?” Don’t be alarmed – they’re not trying to dissuade you; they’re ensuring you’ve thought it through.

“What if I need to use the bathroom in the middle?”

Just ask! “Excuse me, may I use the restroom?” They’re human beings. This happens. It’s fine.

“Should I bring my own siddur?”

Good question! If they ask you to read or demonstrate prayers, they’ll provide a siddur. However, if you have your own well-used siddur with your notes and bookmarks, bringing it can actually be a nice touch – it shows this is your lived reality.

“What if they ask about topics I haven’t learned yet?”

It’s okay to say “I haven’t studied that in depth yet” or “I’d need to consult my rabbi about that specific case.” What they’re evaluating is whether you know enough to live as an Orthodox Jew and whether you know to ask when you’re uncertain. That second part is actually very important – knowing what you don’t know.

“How long does the orthodox beit din meeting last?”

Most orthodox beit din meetings last 30-90 minutes, depending on the questions asked and how the conversation flows. Some are shorter, some longer, but this is the typical range. Therefore, plan for about an hour to be safe.

“Can I prepare for my beit din through online learning?”

Absolutely. Many of my students complete their education online while simultaneously building local community connections. Learn how online Orthodox conversion education works.

My Final Words to You (What I Tell Every Student)

The night before your orthodox beit din, I usually have a final phone call with my students. Here’s what I tell them:

First: I wouldn’t send you if you weren’t ready. I’ve done this hundreds of times. Consequently, I know what ready looks like. Trust me. But more importantly, trust yourself.

Second: These rabbis want you to succeed. They’re not adversaries – they’re your welcoming committee. By the time you walk into that room, they’ve already read my glowing letter about you. Therefore, they’re predisposed to say yes. You just need to confirm what I’ve already told them.

Third: Don’t try to be perfect. Be authentic. Furthermore, speak from your lived experience, not from memorized answers. Tell your story. Share your journey. Let them see the real you – because that’s who’s joining the Jewish people.

Fourth: Remember that conversion isn’t the destination – it’s the starting line. This moment isn’t the peak of your Jewish journey; it’s the beginning. Tomorrow, you’ll still need to keep Shabbat, study Torah, pray, be part of community. The orthodox beit din is just making official what’s already true about you.

And finally: No matter what happens in that room, you’re already on a profound spiritual journey. The beit din might make it official, but your soul has been moving toward this for a long time. Trust that.

Now go. You’re ready. I promise.